Written by Tanya Terry, with photos by Kellie Pardie, courtesy of YWCA of Greater Flint
Featured photo: According to event organizers, the success of the recent Men of Impact Breakfast was measured not by numbers, but by starting conversations and having men publicly stand and commit to taking action against domestic violence.
Mary Combi, development director at the YWCA of Greater Flint, and Casey Lester, a committee member for local YWCA’s Men Impact breakfast, recently discussed the organization’s efforts to address domestic violence in the area.
The event was held in advance of Domestic Violence Awareness Month, which began October 1.
Lester highlighted that one in three men will perpetrate domestic or sexual violence against women at some point in their lives, with the primary focus of the event being to engage the other two-thirds of men to recognize and speak up against violence.
The event featured speaker Tony Porter from A Call to Men, whose program “The Man Box” addresses toxic masculinity and harmful social norms around masculinity that begin in childhood through language like telling boys they’re playing like girls.
Porter was joined by Kimya Motley, chief advancement officer for A Call to Men and a survivor of domestic violence. Motley also emphasized the need to involve men in prevention efforts.
“She told a story about her own domestic violence,” recalled Lester. “It was situation where she had been shot, her child had been shot and they shouldn’t have survived. They did, and then she really committed to making a change.
“She didn’t want to work with men until she realized, ‘hey, like, we can’t just be talking to half the population. It isn’t just a women’s issue. We need the whole community involved.’
“…And one of the points in her story was that at the time husband was becoming violent and things were going downhill, she went to his dad and said, ‘I’m experiencing some things.’ He didn’t say anything to his son. She went to his boss -when it got even worse, who was his best friend. He didn’t say anything at the time.
“So, when we look at that two -hirds to one-third had those other two men maybe said something, could it have prevented her from being shot three times in the head? Could it have prevented her 3-year-old daughter from getting shot? Could it have prevented any of that? We don’t know because they didn’t say anything. And so that’s the call to men. And that was the two thirds versus the one third.”
Impact Breakfast,.
Lester explained his motivation for involvement stemmed from wanting to protect the women in his life and raise his sons better.
Combi stressed that the YWCA of Greater Flint operates a 24/7 crisis helpline at (810) 238-7233. The local organization also has a safe house for domestic violence and sexual violence victims, serving both men and women.
Last year they received 1,763 helpline calls and housed 338 guests including 176 women and 162 children in Genesee County.
The Men of Impact Breakfast drew approximately 200 attendees and featured young men from community organizations making public commitments to combat domestic violence.
Other committee members for the Men of Impact Breakfast included Dr. Bernadette Atanga, Jill Carr, Matt Rozen, Omar Sims, Shon Hart , Steven L. Phillips and Theresa Hurley Cooney
According to Combi and Lester, the success of the event was measured not by numbers, but by starting conversations and having men publicly stand and commit to taking action.
The YWCA of Greater Flint plans to continue the Men of Impact initiative throughout the year.
According to event organizers, the success of the Men of Impact breakfast event was measured not by numbers, but by starting conversations and having men publicly stand and commit to taking action against domestic violence.
